Saturday, June 15, 2013

Still waiting...

It's still 5 more days till we could even think about taking a pregnancy test. I can't wait!

I'm worried.  There is still a 20-25% chance that this pregnancy won't take. And that is without all the information I would like. Wife has already had two failed pregnancies, albeit, over a decade ago. But that makes me worry our chances are lower. 
I worry because Wife is miserable. She's unhappy, she hurts, she's irritable. I realize these may be due to all the mess she's on, or they might not. I want her to be comfy and happy. 
I worry because she was cramping last night and had a lot of back pain. That can be a good sign or a bad sign. She's either implanting, or miscarrying, or neither. 
I worry because there is a 12% chance of twins. I worry because I think she thought the chances were much higher. I think she has convinced herself we are having twins. We implanted 2 because it brought our, already good chances of around 60-70% up to around 75-82%. Now this is not an 82% chance of twins, just implantation of a baby. 
I worry because there is a 12% chance of twins. Twins complicate EVERYTHING. They make the pregnancy more risky.  More danger to babies, more danger to mom.  They make having the babies harder. Right now, we don't really want to have the babies in our state, because we both cant legally be their parents.  Because of that we are looking at going to NY where we were legally married and where we have some friends and family.  Having twins makes this more difficult as it is harder to predict when the babies will come. Mainly because it becomes a fight to keep them in as long as possible. 
Right now I'm just worried. I hope against hope that this pregnant takes. It's all I think about. 

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